Some of you had a shitty 420. Maybe you had to work late or you couldn’t get your hands on any bud. Well, this right here might top them all. The DEA raid this 420 party where they find marijuana, shrooms, extasy (18,000 pills!), weapons, ammo, and 24-year old engineering student Daniel Chong. He’s detained (not arrested) and he admits to smoking weed. And then…
“They never came back, ignored all my cries and I still don’t know what happened,” he told the TV station. “I’m not sure how they could forget me.” Chong says he was forced to drink his own urine to keep hydrated, and ingested some methamphetamine he found to stay awake. “I had to do what I had to do to survive,” he said.
What!? He took some meth that just happened to be lying around? Anyway, it gets worse.
By the third day, Chong was hallucinating and became suicidal, trying to take his own life with a shard he broke off his glasses with his teeth. By the fifth day, when the cell door finally opened, Chong’s attorney Gene Iredale says his client was “completely incoherent.”
Chong was taken to Sharp Hospital, where he remained for three days in the intensive care unit with near-failing kidneys. He still hasn’t received an apology or explanation from the DEA, and says he missed his midterms and may not return to UCSD.
Okay, definitely not funny. At all. Dude almost died. So why can’t I stop laughing? I guess it’s because it reminds me of something that might’ve happened to one of MY friends. Like.. getting caught at the wrong place at the wrong time and getting ROYALLY screwed over, coming out of the situation as the ILLEST victim. And while he’s telling us this story, we’re equal parts blown away, glad he’s okay, and cracking up at the sheer ridiculousness of what actually happened. Also, Son, you drank piss? Oh man. Anyway, I’m glad he’s okay and I’m sure he’ll get a nice settlement out of this.